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Yes, It's True: Jar Jar Binks Is Officially Returning To Star Wars

jarjar

Beloved Star Wars prequel character Jar Jar Binks is making his long-awaited triumphant return to the Star Wars universe… in the pages of a book.

Oh yeah, that's right, we said in a book. And just in a single interlude chapter at that! What are you gonna do about it, @FilmClickbait?!

According to a story currently circling the drain of the 24 hour entertainment news cycle, Binks will appear thankfully not in an upcoming Star Wars movie but in the interlude of a Star Wars novel, where we can all politely ignore it. According to potato-themed pop culture site MashableStar Wars Aftermath: Empire's End by Chuck Wendig, which is part of the Star Wars: Aftermath trilogy of novels, which is itself part of Journey to Star Wars: The Force Awakens, a Lucasfilm publishing initiative designed to fill in gaps between previous Star Wars movies and The Force Awakens, so it's in continuity with the films. Jar Jar appears in a standalone interlude chapter, showing where he ended up after the Empire is defeated in Return of the Jedi.

Photo of Chuck Wendig
Star Wars Aftermath author Chuck Wendig

And where he ended up is pretty interesting. Jar Jar is a an exile from his people, performing as a clown for children while adults shun him. Meta-commentary on Jar Jar's reception from Star Wars fans? Or just a really bizarre freaking scene? You be the judge, as iO9 published some excerpts:

Since children started coming in by the shipload as refugees, the Gungan has served them, performing for the kids once or twice a day. He does tricks. He juggles. He falls over and shakes his head as his eyes roll around inside their fleshy stalks. He makes goofy sounds and does strange little dances. Sometimes it's the same performance, repeated. Sometimes the Gungan does different things, things you've never seen, thing's you'll never see again. Just a few days ago, he splashed into the fountain's center, then pretended to have the streams shoot him way up in the air. He leapt straight up, then back down with a splash. And he leapt from compass point to compass point, back and forth, before finally conking his head on the edge and plopping down on his butt. Shaking his head. Tongue wagging. All the kids laughed. Then the Gungan laughed, too.

The clown, they called him "Bring the clown. We want to see the clown. We like it how he juggles glombo shells, or spits fish up in the air and catches them, or how he dances around and falls on his butt."

The adults, though. They don't say much about him. Or to him. And no other Gungans come to see him, either. Nobody even says his name.

Asked by a child why adults hate him, Jar Jar responds, "Yousa no see The Phantom Menace?" Just kidding, here's what he actually says:

"My no so sure." The Gungan makes a hmm sound. "Mesa thinks it cause-o Jar Jar makin some uh-oh mistakens. Big mistakens. Der Gunga bosses banished me longo ago. Mesa no been to hom in for-ebbers. And desa hisen Naboo tink I help the uh-oh Empire."

It's not quite as good as the theory that Jar Jar was originally planned to be a Sith lord, but it'll have to do. It also makes one thing scarily clear: Jar Jar could still be alive in the Sequel Trilogy, so he could, technically, appear in a future Star Wars film. Yousa like?

 


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Jude TerrorAbout Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!
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