Legendary Hollywood gossip columnist Hedda Hopper once said, “Entertainment journalism is 1% investigation, 99% carefully tracking the interpersonal relationships between industry personalities over social media.” Hopper made absolutely no sense at the time, as Twitter wasn’t founded until fifty years after her death, but she was correct nonetheless. The latest rumor that required 1% or less investigation circling the bowl of the 24 hour entertainment news cycle is that Celebrity Apprentice host Arnold Schwarzenegger could be up for a role DC’s upcoming Wonder Woman movie. The news comes via ComicBook.com, who note that both Wonder Woman director Patty Jenkins and DC Entertainment exec and twelve year old boy who switched bodies with his dad in an 80s comedy Geoff “Jeff” Johns have followed The Governator on Twitter.
Fittingly, the source of the news, if traced back through Reddit to this tweet, seem to indicate that the discovery was literally made by Batman himself:
Patty Jenkins and Geoff Johns both followed Arnold .
— Batman (@Batmancanseeyou) February 12, 2017
Batman’s paranoia is completely out of control this time. Keeping secret plans to defeat all of his best friends in case they ever need to be shut down is one thing, but this is obsessive, even for a man hanging out in his basement dressed in a homemade bat costume.
Of course, it’s possible that everyone is looking at this from the wrong angle. What if Wonder Woman is only the beginning? What if Arnold is joining the DCEU so that he can later reprise his Batman and Robin role as Mr. Freeze in The Batman? What if Matt Reeves, like communism, is just a red herring, and Joel Schumacher is returning to reclaim the Batman franchise? What if that’s why Ben Affleck has been trying to escape this whole time?
These are important questions, but sadly, we’re unlikely to get answers, unless those answers can be found in the social media analytics of Geoff Johns. Wonder Woman hits theaters in June.