Forty-Three Thoughts About Forty-Three Comics – Forever Evil, Ms Marvel, Punisher, Iron Man, Invincible Universe, Earth 2, New Avengers, Captain America, Minimum Wage, Rover Red Charlie, God Is Dead, Gate Way, Archer And Armstrong, Jennifer Blood, Turok, Vampirella, Juice Squeezers, Terminator, Catalyst, Lobster Johnson, Robocop, Judge Dredd, Transformers, Illegitimates, Revelations, God Is Dead, Regular Show, Aliens Vs Parker, Baltimore, GI Joe, Mega City 2, My Little Pony, Indestructable, Arkham War, The Movement, Suicide Risk, Sinister Dexter, Lazarus, Painkiller Jane, Garfield, Victories, Secret, Green/Red Lantern, Superior Carnage, Superior Foes.

Garfield_22_panel

It’s morning Garfield! For me anyway. Though it will be afternoon by the time this actually gets posted. Still, he does a good lecture to the comic industry in his comic book from Boom today…

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Victories #9 is also rather inspirational when it comes to making a stand! So remember, the next time an editor send you notes, commit hari kiri. That’ll show them.

secret

Secret returns with #5 and a shattered panel lay out that provides for a rather well put together montage of criminal planning.

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Boxing clever in Green Lantern/Red Lantern flipbooks. Sadly we don’t get to see Red Lantern Supergirl throw up in either of the flipbook issues. I thought that was the point of Red Lanterns?

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Superior Carnage Annual also features characters motivated by hate. And in this case a female scientist under the thumb at home might probably grate a little…

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Superior Foes Of Spider-Man show just how superior they can be, with a disembodied head managing to flex its neck and leap from the table in an aggressive stature.

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Of course it’s not just disembodied heads that can cause problems, as Forever Evil: Arkham War proves. Now let’s have a lesson in language, courtesy of The Movement and Painkiller Jane.

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She’s a woman, so she can use it. She lives.

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He’s a man, so he can’t. He dies. Probably.

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And in Suicide Risk #10, one fellow shows he really deserves a superspeed fist to the face.

lazarus

And Lazarus would be just the one to give it… if she didn’t actually have X-Ray Vision. Or thermal sensing. Or something.

Sinister Dexter #3

I’m glad to know that Sinister Dexter #3 is full of moral life lessons, aren’t you?

Green gas in the Marvel Universe has a tendency to have different effects depending what book it appears in. For example, in Ms Marvel #1…

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…it’s Terrigen gases, that transform folk into Inhuman creations. While in Punisher #1…

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…it just knocks people out. Okay, let’s see how Red Peril is doing over in Iron Man with her Iron Mandarinness.

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You know, I’m going to try that for size. See how it works. Still we all know that the scummy hacks are the bad guys in comic books.

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Though Invincible Universe gives the case for the defence.

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Jennifer Blood goes straight for the parental jugular. It’s going to be arguments over Steve Irwin all over again.Turok 1 (preview 2_5)

It doesn’t take much for a parent to flip modes and tone when dealing with kids. Nice, safe tone for the little ones, turn round, close the door and then scream the house down. Family issues with Turok #1…Vampi 38 (preview 2_5)

Vampirella gives us the most disturbing game of Blind Man’s Bluff I’ve ever seen. And I’ve played it at Ben Cliff’s fifth birthday party, so that’s saying something!

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And with Loki already sounding like Kieron Gillen Loki, could sudden musical references be spreading? We had The Cure from Jonathan Hickman in last week’s Avengers, now check out Tom Taylor in Earth 2.

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With the new Secret Avengers looking like it is going to give us a Fury Vs Nick Fury battle, I’m in the mood for some Moore/Davis era Captain Britainness. And New Avengers delivers that with a little aside here, and Captain Britain behaving like a proper hero for once. Even if it is in an alternate universe.

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Captain America gives us another fish bout of water experience in a diner. And revulsion at the food being served, due to its fatty content.

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While Minimum Wage, my utter book of the week, does the same. But this is a real world problem, how does the rest of comic books tackle such issues?

Gate Way #2

Thank you Gate Way #2 for seeing the bigger picture and not dismissing the impossibles.

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 Archer And Armstrong get visitors from Bloodshot And The Hard CORPS but resist he temptation to rename the comic for one issue Archer And Bloodshot And Armstrong And The Hard CORPS. They should learn from Green Lantern/Red Lanterns.

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Juice Squeezers #2 tackles the very real problems of modern youth. Whether or not we believe we are giant squirrels. I’ve been there, we all have.

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Terminator #3 continues to inflict serious vehicular damage. Talk about changing the timestream, there’s a ding that they’ll never get out. Who can conceive of the repurcussions???

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Catalyst #8… and not The Matrix. Honest. There are very special legal differences defined here. Also, not John Byrne’s Next Men of someone is going to bring that up. Or Red Dward’s Back To Reality. Or… etc etc…

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Lobster Johnson: Get Lobster #1 may stun the crowd speechless but look how those lips are hanging onto that cigarette. Don’t let go lips, don’t let go!

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Yeah, I’m going to guess the latter charge is worse than the former ones. Possibly a bad perp decision in Robocop Hominem Ex Machina. But he really is Judge Dredd, isn’t he? I mean, even more than usual?

Judge Dredd Classics #8

Talking of which, from Judge Dredd Classics #8, is he talking about a floating dooky there? It just sounds like another faecal euphemism…

TF More Than Meets The Eye #26

And there’s another from Transformers More Than Meets The Eye #26

Illegitimates #3

And the euphemism flips the other way in Illegitimates #3.

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And Red Rover Charlie sees Garth Ennis take it where it really shouldn’t go at all.

Okay, now from the back, to the front…

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Revelations #2 celebrates that most English of swear words. It really is the wanker of all swear words.

 

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God Is Dead sees Stephen Hawking pitched against Zeus. Who do you think will win in that one? The answer may… not surprise you at all.

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Regular Show #9 rediscovers the nineties. Hmm, you know, I never really got a grip on what the 90s were until around 2004. Madchester, Diana, chromium covers, New Labour, flares, bagged comics and Our Friends In The North. Does anyone understand what the noughties were yet?

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Okay, if they are going to censor something like this, in Aliens Vs Parker...

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Shouldn’t there also be a black bar here or something in Baltimore? The object seems to be fulfilling the same function.

GI Joe #13

GI Joe #13 sees a rather right wing austere approach to the more unfortunate in life. Cameron’s Britain, folks, Cameron’s Britain.

Mega-City Two #2

Mega-City Two #2 teaches us all a lesson about commercialisation. They should have had him at the Super Bowl.

MLP #16

My Little Pony #16 threatens to break out the Michael Jackson. Somehow I can’t see that going down too well with the kiddies.

Indestructible #3

In Indestructible #3… it’s Simon Pegg. Isn’t it? It’s Simon Pegg…

So, what did you buy today?

Comics courtesy of Orbital Comics, of London, with an evening with Savage Pencil at 7pm on Friday.

About Rich Johnston

Chief writer and founder of Bleeding Cool. Father of two. Comic book clairvoyant. Political cartoonist.

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