Viva Piracy!" Says A Stumped Mark Waid At WonderCon

"How do you think the world will actually end?" asked Mainline. Waid hesitated for a bit, before picking up his iPhone and asking Siri the question. There was no response from Siri. I kinda suspect that Waid doesn't have a 4S and was just faking it personally. (Also, that probably would have been a disqualification anyways, the panel isn't Stump Siri") Waid's somber answer was that he believes in the singularity, and that machines will become smart enough to rise against us. He already has machines that are smarter than him in his home that rebel against him on a regular basis.It was meant to be a funny joke. It came across as a somber prediction of humanity's extinction.(CBR poster Anodyne's lengthy question involving forgotten plot developments from Daredevil stories that Waid wasn't involved with got skipped, as were many others. I am listing every question that was asked, so if you don't see yours here, it didn't get brought up at the panel.)Next question: "So at this point, thanks to the Internet, we all know that Clark Kent's social security number is 092-09-6616. But what's his pants size?" asked StoneGold. Waid immediately answered 32 inches, leading several people in the audience to wonder if that was a realistic size for someone so built as Superman. Waid then showed off with his knowledge of Superman's phone number. "505-0162. What do they teach you in school?"Schnitzy Pretzelpants asked many questions, but the only one that Mosher read to Waid was "What is a Marvel character you have yet to write in a monthly that you would love to have a chance at?" Waid immediately ruled out Thor, not because he doesn't like the character but because he can't do the sort of stylized Shakespearean language needed. He does have a single good Wolverine story in mind, so he'd do a short run on Wolverine.

While Mosher skimmed the next batch of questions for suitability, an audience member asked "Klaw, the Master of Sound, is related to what other Marvel character?"  Waid was stunned and dumbfounded. He asked DC editor Ivan Cohen, who was in the audience, if this was a legitimate question. Cohen confirmed, and Waid had to admit defeat. The answer was Sgt. Fury recurring foe Colonel Klaue who Roy Thomas later retconned into being Klaw's father in a single backup story in an anthology in the 90s.

The next audience member put a comic in the air. Waid instantly identified it as Mystery in Space #103, the first appearance of Ultra the Multi-Alien. The audience member agreed, and asked what the four aliens were that gave Ultra his powers. "As most schoolchildren know, Ace Arn was hit by the special weapons of four different aliens all from four different races all at the same time." Waid then got Ulla, Laroo, Trago and with a subtle audience assist was able to get Raagin. Because ULTRA consisted of Ulla, Laroo, Trago, Raagin and Ace Arn. Waid also knew what the other story in that issue was, a Space Ranger feature. "Now, ask me who my senator is!" lamented Waid.

KurtW95 asked "What is the backstory of the new Nova, Sam Alexander?" Waid couldn't answer, because it's tied into Avengers vs. X-Men. "Go ask Jeph Loeb."

Scott Mateo asked "Will Rich Rider and the other Guardians of the Galaxy show up in your NOVA run?" Waid clarified that it's not as much of a full run on Nova as it is one story that will lead the character into the Marvel Universe and other titles. "So your guess is as good as mine."

Terima Kasih from Malaysia asked about Waid's view on Kickstarter. Waid replied enthusiastically about Kickstarter being a valid way to crowdsource funding for projects. He acknowledged that most projects aren't going to make it, and that soon the Kickstarter bubble will burst. "The important takeaway for me is the crowd sourcing funding in general. I think it will get stronger and stronger. It helps us as creators to connect on a one to one level with the fans. Gives a chance to connect with us, to be part of a process. Kickstarter's great."

Darrell D. asked "Will you be allowing a 'Before Irredeemable' series?"  "Paging J. Michael Straczynski!" quipped Waid.

Goof asked "Why isn't there an Iditarod for cats?" Waid remarked that he has a hard enough time getting his cat to walk across the room. The next question from Michael P. elaborated on that , "You ever tried getting 8 cats into a sled harness?"

Yeah. This was a silly panel.

We then returned to audience questions. The most ridiculous trivia question I've ever seen came up, as an audience member just said the name "John Fagan." Leaving Waid really confused. The audience member explained that it's like the final round in Jeopardy, you get given a tiny bit of information. Of course, you at least have a category in Jeopardy. After much cajoling, he elaborated by asking what's on the cover of that issue, who was the artist, who was the writer. Waid couldn't figure it out from that. I doubt anyone could figure it out from that. (John Wells perhaps, but he's not human.) Waid gave up, after trying to get the guy to give at least some sort of reasonable context or clue. He didn't really do so. Waid admitted defeat, mainly just to get past this bizarre incident. The answer turned out to be
that John Fagan was a minor supporting character from a Daredevil issue written by Frank Miller and drawn by John Buscema where the cover has the words "We've got a nasty little town here stranger… and we aim to KEEP it that way."

Yeah. That was a thing that happened.

The next audience member first gave his love and admiration for the late, The Traveller series that Waid did for Boom with Stan Lee. He then asked what the best fuel economy on the planet was. Waid guessed 57 miles a gallon. Apparently the answer was 15,000 miles per gallon, according to some youtube video the guy had watched. As youtube is of course a perfect source of accurate information. Still, that was a stumper. Also not fair at all, but a stumper.

Next audience question was for Waid to name three employees of the Hero Hotline, a comic series from DC in the 80s. Which caused Waid to lament, for he had discovered girls by then and wasn't as strong in his comics trivia. He did give a nod to Steve DeStefano's excellent work, and remembered some but not enough.

Next fan asked a series of Spider-Man questions. The names of Peter Parker's parents. Waid immediately answered Richard and Mary Parker. Peter Parker's middle name. Waid stumbled on that one, and needed a little hint and push from the audience but did get Benjamin at the end. Flash Thompson's real name completely eluded him. "Wally West Thompson!" joked Waid. As any child knows, the answer is Eugene, which caused Waid to understand why he's gone by a nickname all these years.  The fan asked if Waid knew what "the infamous coloring error" was. Not being psychic, Waid didn't. There apparently was an issue, Amazing Spider-Man #9 if I heard him right, where the coloring in a panel dropped off Spider-Man's pants, making him look like he burst through a window naked.

A fan in the back of the room asked Waid how if he was in the DC Universe, would fix a Chronoton explosion. Like the one in the Teen Titans cartoon that caused a city to be frozen in time. Once Waid realized that this wasn't a "what was how they solved that problem in an obscure episode" question but a "how would you, as a DC writer, figure out a solution to that problem?" question, he came up with using the Time Trapper's Iron Curtain of Time to wrap around the city and contain the explosion.

The first time Superman traveled through time was the next question. Waid answered that he went back in time to help a young crippled boy complete his autograph collection by going back in time to collect George Washington and other historical figures's signatures. Waid joked that it probably would have been easier for Superman to just take the book elsewhere and forge their signatures perfectly. The follow up question is which autograph let the boy win the contest. "Superman's." was Waid's correct answer.

Mark Waid's Friendly Trivia Rival Tom Galloway sent in a special question: to name four of Superman's cousins, how they survived the explosion of Krypton, their parents' names, and how they're related to Kal-El. Waid fired off Van-Zee, Don-el, Ar-Dron, and with a little prodding from the audience remembered the most important cousin of all, Kara Zor-El. Kara's parents were Zor-El and Allura. They survived the destruction of Argo City through the Survival Zone, which is the first cousin of the Phantom Zone. (Given that the Phantom Zone was later revealed to be alive and sentient by Steve Gerber, I find that joking explanation of Waid's to be scarily plausible, but I digress.) Waid continued on to give the names of Superman's father and grandfather, which were both Jor-El. And that Krypto's father was Zypto and his grandfather was Nypto.

I personally asked a rather cruel question, "In which DC book did Paul Levitz explain how Supergirl existed in a post-Crisis continuity." Waid was frazzled by the question, because as any child knows, that was a topic that never got addressed in the pages of the Legion of Super-Heroes comic book. The answer was Paul Levitz's introduction to the Great Darkness Saga TPB, where he alludes to it briefly in a single sentence. The book was published when Mark Waid was an editor on the collected editions line, which is the only reason I felt it even the slightest bit fair to ask.

Lightning round!

Who was Shredder's brother in the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles comics? Waid had no clue. The answer was Oroko Nagi.

The first appearance and source of power for Marvel villain Daddy Longlegs? "WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!" asked Waid, admitting defeat. (Spider-Woman #47. Stole a serum.)

The secret identity of Shadowman, and "which issue of Zap Comix had a blue-ish green-ish man thing on the cover?" Waid correctly got Zap Comix #0, but was stumped on Shadowman, who turned out to be Jack Boniface. From Valiant. Seriously? Valiant?

In the What If issue where Thanos got the Infinity Gauntlet, how did he defeat Wolverine or Quasar? Waid had no clue. Turns out he melts Quasar's hands off, which causes him to die.

Someone began to ask a Rom the Spaceknight question, leading Waid to preemptively declare defeat because there's no chance he'd have any idea about anything Rom.

Why did the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen book get pulped? Waid answered that it was because of the Marvel Douche ads. True story. Bing it.

Why is the Hulk green? "Because Gamma energy is green." answered Waid, before realizing that he wanted the real world explanation. That the Hulk was grey in the first issue, but they couldn't make a consistent grey with the printing technology of the time, but he did end up green in a single panel due to a coloring error, and Stan Lee liked it.

What sound effect was removed from the trade of Infinite Crisis? Waid had no clue, but did remember when the fan explained the sound of Batman cocking the trigger of the gun on Alexander Luthor's head was removed due to confusion and controversy.

The final question of the panel was from something Waid actually had a chance of answering, and was something from the Jerry Lewis comics that I couldn't parse at all.Final verdict: Waid is never ever going to do a panel like this again. "The whole sideshow element of this is kind of disturbing. Next WonderCon, Mark Waid bites the heads off chickens!"