Theft at Star Wars Mandalorian Set Suspiciously Occurs the Same Week George Lucas Visits

News at your own risk, by Jude Terror

Theft at Star Wars Mandalorian Set Suspiciously Occurs the Same Week George Lucas Visits

Posted by October 27, 2018 Comment

Is George Lucas trying to “special edition” the upcoming Star Wars TV series The Mandalorian? The Star Wars creator visited the set where the show is being filmed, ostensibly to wish showrunner Jon Favreau a happy birthday. However, police are now investigating a theft this same week in which equipment may have been stolen from the camera department, including a memory drive that might contain secrets from the production, according to a report from fart-themed celebrity gossip site The Blast.

We’re not saying that Lucas stole the cameras and the drive. There’s absolutely no evidence whatsoever to suggest that happened, and saying it did would be very irresponsible. However, there’s no evidence that Lucas didn’t steal the drive either. So it would also be very irresponsible of us not to speculate. And if there’s one thing we here at Bleeding Cool hate to be, it’s irresponsible, which means it’s time for a little column we like to call: Lying in the Gutters!

Wait, no, that’s Rich’s shameless rumourmongering column. We’ll call this one News It or Lose It!

 

For more on the potential theft of Mandalorian equipment and secrets by George Lucas, we spoke with world-renowned criminologist and real person, Detective Professor Thaddeus T. Puffinbottoms.

“A tubby gossip reporter waddled into my office, looking about as hungry for a story as a he was a roast beef sandwich,” said Professor Puffinbottoms. “If I’d known it known it would be this kind of day, I’d have had more bourbon at breakfast.”

Professor, you’re narrating out loud again.

“Sorry,” he replied, tossing his fedora across the room. “I do that whenever I’m wearing this hat.”

We wanted your thoughts on the Star Wars theft.

“Of course. When I investigate a crime of this magnitude involving a beloved geek franchise, the first thing I look to consider is the motive,” Puffinbottoms explained. “Who would want to steal that drive? And why?”

With Lucas’s visit coinciding with the theft, Puffinbottoms says that the opportunity was there for Lucas to engage in one of his favorite pastimes: retroactively editing Star Wars scenes. “Since selling off Lucasfilm, George Lucas hasn’t had the opportunity to take the theatrically-released versions of Star Wars movies and mess with them to make changes like Greedo and Han shooting at the same time, or to add unnecessary special effects. That’s got to be eating at him.”

And so, while visiting the set, Puffinbottoms says its plausible that Lucas stole the drive in order to bring filmed footage home and make “special edition” style edits before returning it, hoping to slip his changes into the finished product.

“Stealing the other equipment would be a cover-up to mask the true purpose,” said Puffinbottoms. “If I were running this investigation, I’d be watching closely to see if Lucas finds another opportunity to visit the set again, and whether he brings the stolen drive with him.”

At press time, rumors circulating out of San Rafael, California claim that Lucas had invited Jar Jar Binks actor Ahmed Best to a studio at the Skywalker Ranch, where deliveries of motion capture equipment had been seen just days earlier. We’ll keep you updated on this breaking story as it develops.

(Last Updated October 27, 2018 11:23 am )

Related Posts

About Jude Terror

A prophecy says that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero will come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events.

Scourge of Rich Johnston, maker of puns, and seeker of the Snyder Cut, Jude Terror, sadly, is not the hero comics needs right now... but he's the one the industry deserves.

View All Posts