In a move that could have unforeseen consequences for national security, a group of comic shops are sending all 3000 copies of their Gabrielle Dell’otto variant for Defenders #4 to U.S. troops stationed overseas.
Frankie’s Comics and The Variant Collective (consisting of The Comic Mint, Sad Lemon, 7ate9, Amorphous Ink, and Golden Apple) have announced that they will donate all copies of their Defenders #4 retailer variant to an organization called Operation Gratitude, which ships care packages to the troops. The comic, #4 in an ongoing series written by “The Great One” Brian Bendis with art by David Marquez, is due out in August.
The problem is, this Marvel comic is almost certainly “written for the trade,” providing just one chapter out of what is likely a five or six issue complete story. Without copies of the first three issues, providing the setup to the story, and without the next one or two providing an ending, our troops will be left wondering what the hell is going on, waiting for a resolution to the story that isn’t there.
“Our troops may be left feeling confused, even demoralized, after reading this comic by Brian Bendis,” said military expert and recent Trump appointee General Thaddeus T. Puffinbottoms. “When we need our troops to be thinking about strategy and proper fighting techniques, they’ll be pondering Bendis’s deep dialogue and subtle plotting, instead of focusing on the true enemy: The Purple Man.”
“No! Wait! I mean ISIS!” General Puffinbottoms hastily added. “See? Even I’m distracted now. This is terrible!”
But despite the warnings of this highly respected five star general (six stars in the Tokyo Dome), The Variant Collective plans to go through with their plans, shipping 3,000 copies of the variant to troops, while selling 600 copies of a “virgin variant” to customers for $20 each, great for collecting or for throwing into volcanoes to appease angry gods.
“We’re obviously not making any money at that price even if we sell out,” said Frankie Fields of Frankie’s Comics. “But this release isn’t about that. We just wanted to do something cool for our soldiers and the collecting community. I wish we could have announced this on July 4th, as that was the impetus for the idea, but it took longer than we thought to find a charity that would actually put the books in the hands of the troops. There are a lot of charities out there that claim to do it, but when you read the fine print, that’s not what they actually do. We’re so happy to be working with Operation Gratitude on this, as we know that our military men and women will have these in their hands soon.”
To order copies of the virgin variant, visit one of the following websites:
- Former WWE Star Enzo Amore Kicked Off Plane for Vaping - November 15, 2018
- Bolt Thrower, Pantera, and Yngwie Malmsteen Albums Homaged in Latest Murder Falcon Variants - November 15, 2018
- Cyclops and Wolverine are the Last X-Men in Uncanny X-Men #12 - November 15, 2018
- Pak and Milonogiannis Explore Post-Apocalyptic Samurai in Ronin Island in March - November 15, 2018
- Dark Horse Declares March 23rd is Hellboy Day - November 15, 2018