Vertigo - Baby Demon Penises, The Alien West Wing, Deadton Abbey And Grave Expectations

[Rich Johnston]

I read a little concern from certain retailers over the Vertigo Preview 2012, out free in comic stores today, over the fact that the Fairest preview contained full frontal nudity, and they may not have expected that in a free giveaway. Goodness, I thought. And considered that it would be remiss of me not to at least take a look and see what's what. On your behalf, you understand.

And indeed there is full frontal nudity. Of the blue baby demon variety.



Bloody hell. With Before Watchmen on the way, that's all we need, more small blue penises. Thankfully, for the more male, heterosexual, non-paedophile, there is some eye candy in the Fairest preview, albeit fully clothed. And I mean fully clothed.



Swit swoo. Thank you Bill Willingham, Phil Jimenez and Andy Lanning.

From fairytales to zombies, The New Deadwardians by Lanning's common writing partner, Dan Abnett and INJ Culbard beautifully picks up on the recent revival of Upstairs, Downstairs and the success of Downton Abbey by pitching a zombie storyline both above and below stairs.



The epiome of the class system here is turned on its head, the masters and the servants, reflected in the living and the undead, and with all the language that comes with this kind of period piece. Oh and bit of Sherlock Holmes while we're at it.



And, just as with such pieces, we have those characters stuck in the middle, neither comfortably one side or the other, an making those on either side vaguely uncomfortable. With tragedy laying out, without a single gag, without a set up or punchline, purely the juxtaposition of realities, it's hilarious.

Not something you can say of Dominique Laveau: Voodoo Child. You can read the whole preview at io9, by Selwyn Seyfu Hinds with artists Denis Cowan and John Floyd giving us a kind of Mark Bagley roughed up a bit with some spiralling layouts to boot, as a child comes face to face with hr heritage. Not everyone wants their inheritance...



But the best of the bunch is Saucer Country by Paul Cornell and Ryan Kelly. With a potential presidential candidate having visions of being abducted by aliens. We're always told that the President of the USA knows all about alien landings on Earth and covers them up. Well here, someone wants to get to that position in order to find the truth. But to do so... the comic has to basically become the West Wing. Now I loved the West Wing. And I think this scene feels so right, so very right.



Voodoo, zombies, aliens and fairy tales. With American Zombie the question we must now ask is... where are the werewolves and mummies?

Vertigo Preview 2012 is available free from comic stores today. Comics are courtesy of Orbital Comics in London, UK. They are currently exhibiting the original art of Mary Talbot and Bryan Talbot's Dotter Of Her Father's Eyes.

[Candletric]

Emma Frost AND "Jean Grey" laying together while Scott Summers watches.....WOWZERS!

[myakoopa]

Sadly, none of those brief synopses or snippets piqued my interest, though I like some of the names attached. Perhaps the full previews at the shop today will change my mind.

[Dans07sti]

He has blue balls!

[Phil Jimenez]

2 things.

He's not a demon, he's a genie.

My last name is spelled J I M E N E Z. Hear that, Bleeding Cool?

[majorjoe23]

I think you meant American Vampire at the end there.

[Dans07sti]

2 things.

He's not a demon, he's a genie.

My last name is spelled J I M E N E Z. Hear that, Bleeding Cool?

Noting gts speled rite hear!

[thekeith82]

My last name is spelled J I M E N E Z. Hear that, Bleeding Cool?

You got off lightly. A couple of weeks back he was claiming that "Frank Woodring" won an award at Angouleme

[Timberoo]

He has nipples, too! Won't somebody think of the children?!?!

[fredmanson]

Helly Badness!!! This blue Genie (thanks Mr J.I.M.E.N.E.Z.!) has a tiny pee-wee, two hidden tiny ba-balls and two tiny nipples...

Two questions: are these retailers being shocked by the blue skin?? Would they have preferred the baby-pink one??? Perverts!!!!! Burn, you pedophiles!!!! Bring me a HUGE trunk ('the' phallic extra momentum!!) and I will impale them like skewers!!!!

It will be hurtful at the start but think of the enormous advantage: the burritos will come out more easily!!!! Bah, they will have a ton of unsold crap comic books as toilet paper... (I know, I know, I am gross... And why am I always thinking "Marvel" when I write "crap comic books" or "unsold comic books"???... Mysteries... Cheers!!!)


OK, enough of these Naughty Anus Horribilis, I already have signed for the mentioned titles but in viewing the few panels of the New Deadwardians, I think that I will drop it. I prefer the British Dark Humor like in the 2000 AD strips of these kind of stories and there is a lot more action in them. Here, it seems that the main character is an avatar from a 3rd view Kill-a-Zombie-Day crap video-game (why when I write "crap video-game" I always think about Playstation-The-Third-To-Not-Live-Its-10-Promised-Years??? Again, mysteries... Cheers!!!).

Fortunately, for all of you, proud and valorous readers of The Sacro Sanctum Bleeding Cool blog, you have seen MY women slipping well just before I am entering in My bed... Tickles-tickles for a start, then you know after, some adult games, before the first Touchdown!! and the following ones... ("THE" second phallic momentum in this loooooooong post... Cheers!!!)