Steven Moffat’s Audition Script For Jasmine, The New Doctor Who Companion (UPDATE)

The new issue of Doctor Who Magazine hits stores today. You’ll know it from the picture on the cover – see above – not to mention the fact that it’s called Doctor Who Magazine and its position, you know, on the shelves, today.

There’s a lot of interesting bits and pieces in the mag, which is no surprise, there being a new series in the works and all. Perhaps the best bit is a short script, written by Steven Moffat for would-be companions to read and use to audition with Matt Smith.

This is what Jenna-Louise Coleman had to nail in order to win the role. We can probably take the character’s name as accurate, but the rest…? Who knows. It was apparently written just for the audition but how many ideas from the actual show were put in play for this little scene is anybody’s guess. But this is, in some sense, our first look at Jasmine, the new companion, and how she relates to The Doctor. “They” say that none of this will happen, but “they” lie to us. All the time.

Enjoy.

The Doctor and Jasmine are investigating a haunted house.

DOCTOR: So you saw it coming in here? What did it look like?

JASMINE: Grey. Sort of dusty. Like it was made of spider webs.

D: And it came through the wall.

J: Yeah, that wall there.

D: But you don’t think it was a ghost. Why not?

J: Because there’s no such thing as ghosts.

D: You know, a lot of people who saw what you saw wouldn’t still think that.

J: Obviously. Otherwise there wouldn’t be idiots who believe in ghosts.

D: What were you doing here?

J: I love this place. It’s… beautiful.

D: It’s falling apart.

J: It’s old. I love old things, they make me feel sad.

D: What’s good about sad?

J: It’s happy for deep people. You’d know.

D: I’m not sad.

J: Oh, you are though. Under all that talking and leaping about. Takes one to know one.

D: So you come here for… recreational sadness?

J: Yeah. In a way. Okay, why are you looking at me like that?

D: You remind me of an old friend of mine. Someone I lost a long time ago.

J: Down boy. I’m not her.

D: Oh, I know you’re not – I don’t believe in ghosts either.

J: Oh my God, what’s that?

D: Okay, just stay calm.

J: But that’s the thing I saw before.

D: Yep, and it’s coming towards us. I expect you noticed that. Say it with me – I don’t believe in ghosts!

J: I don’t believe in ghosts!

D: Louder! I don’t believe in ghosts!

J: I don’t believe in ghosts!! Will this work?

D: No idea, never met a ghost before.

Our first hint of the Christmas special? Maybe in tone or spirit, no pun intendeed. It’s a British tradition to tell ghost stories during the festive season, and the BBC have certainly screened more than their fair share throughout the years.

Right. I’m off to read the rest of the magazine…

Rich adds: Does any of that dialogue feel familiar? It should… from Steven Moffat’s Blink.

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