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Aqua Globes Explained Via Medium Of Alan Moore

Amazon-owned tech-ish store Woot had a fun little item the other day. The Aqua Globe. And they described it thus;

Aqua Globes Explained Via Medium Of Alan Moore

Like Alan Moore, plants have a job to do, and they do it very well, but they'd really prefer to just sit quietly and do it on their own. They understand that they are the primary source of the food chain and they accept this as their lot in life, but they also want people to understand they can't take all the way to the root, or there's nothing to grow back. Just like Alan Moore, a plant is best when you offer a guiding hand to what it's already doing, with maybe the occasional pruning so it doesn't get out of control and write Lost Girls. And that's why your plant needs a two-pack of these medium sized Aqua Globes. So it can take care of itself.

The design is very simple, you just fill a globe with water, push the tip into the soil, and walk away for two weeks. Gravity and nature takes care of the rest. No spilling, no drips, and best of all, no need to take the plant to court over a contract issue. The plant's happy, because it can do what it wants. And you're happy, because you don't see your name plastered all over industry blogs in front of paragraph long insults. With a set of Aqua Globes, everybody's happy! Except Rich Johnston, but he's had it too easy lately anyway. It's about time he worked for his traffic.

So don't keep disturbing your plant when it doesn't want to be watered. Get this two pack of medium sized Aqua Globes and let IT take control! Also for best results maybe put a little portrait of Thatcher close by. That seems to really work.

I feel so proud.


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Rich JohnstonAbout Rich Johnston

Founder of Bleeding Cool. The longest-serving digital news reporter in the world, since 1992. Author of The Flying Friar, Holed Up, The Avengefuls, Doctor Who: Room With A Deja Vu, The Many Murders Of Miss Cranbourne, Chase Variant. Lives in South-West London, works from Blacks on Dean Street, shops at Piranha Comics. Father of two. Political cartoonist.
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